It is hard to believe that 9 months has flown by so fast. In four weeks or less we will get to meet my precious little Zoe.
I have to admit I'm a little conflicted about this. I am so excited about meeting Zoe, however there is a huge part of me that is very nervous. I'm nervous about labor, and maybe more curious. Zach and I attended a child birth class called, Confident Child Birth, designed to prepare me for a natural birth; and I'm sure it has in many ways. Never less I can't help but wonder are you ever truly prepare? I've read and had many accounts described to me, however part of me still wonders if I'm going to recognize it when it begins to happen to me.
There are already many signs indicating that Zoe will make her debut to the world any week now. As of last weeks doctors appointment I was informed that she has in fact dropped, her head is very low and I began dilation at half a centimeter. After my doctors appointment today the doctor still remarked on how low her head is, and informed me that I am another half a centimeter dilated, making me a total of 1 centimeter dilated. Yes, I am aware that I could stay in this stage for weeks.
Regardless of my dilation the nurse decided it was best to go ahead and schedule another ultrasound for me next week because she felt as though my belly was measuring small. However, she did later mention that she believes that could be due to the fact that her head is so low. Needing another ultrasound is great news to me, its been so long since I've gotten to see her. The last ultrasound was at 18 weeks when we found out the gender. I just can't wait to see her face, and get to know her personality. I've made many predictions, and want to see what comes into fruition.
Although, the idea of meeting her is very exciting it also brings on a whole other bundle of nerves. Am I ready to care for a baby? Will I be a good mother? Am I going to be able to cater to all her needs? I'm glad I'll be off work until January. However, I'm already apprehensiveness about the idea of going back to work. In many ways teaching takes dedication as much as being a parent. Am I going to be able to juggle the load of motherhood and working? I am planning to breast feed, and am very uncertain how this will interfere with my daily school schedule. This is exactly where I need to follow my wonderful husbands advice. I need to stop worrying about things I have no control over at the moment. Things will happen as they are suppose to happen.
My guess is you're measuring small both because her head is low and because you have a small(er) baby! Neither you nor Zach are big people and you were apparently tiny when you were born. A small baby for you two would be completely healthy and normal. That's one thing with growth charts and such that you have to be careful with, and a good doctor/pediatrician won't just look at weight and height percentiles but will take parent's size and norms into account as well.
ReplyDeleteIt will be very exciting to see little Zoe one more time before she arrives!
I don't think my doctors are really worried. I think their just scheduling an ultrasound as an extra precaution. Just to check and see how she's doing. Which doesn't bother me. I like being able to see her through an ultrasound.
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