Week 11- It's a LIME

It is still a struggle for me to sit down and write this blog.  It is hard to share my good news when others around me are not able to share in the same joy.   I have not heard from my sister in a few days, and am wondering if she soon will be able to share the same news.   Will I get to share this experience with my best friend?  Maybe then I wont feel like I am boasting.

I am continually thankful.  I feel so fortunate to have the experience I am having, and it has been a wonderful experience. Aside from mild morning sickness, and sleepiness I've had very few symptoms. So few symptoms if it was not for the ultrasound photos I hardly even feel pregnant. I'm looking forward to the next few weeks when I will finally get to feel the baby move.  As the connection grows between me and my child I expect the babies movements will give me more insight on who my child is going to be.  I'm curious about what the fetus will respond to, and what kind of activity I'm going to feel as my child gets bigger.  I am currently 11 weeks pregnant, and have already seen an amazing amount of growth through the ultrasound.  The first ultrasound looked like a little peanut, but in the second ultrasound at ten weeks I was able to see the large head developing, and tell the difference between the rest of the body.

 

As my body is developing a stronger connection to the fetus my brain is has been distracted.  According the my brother-in-law, "The baby is eating my brain."  I've found myself walking into rooms forgetting what I was there to do much more frequently.  A couple weeks ago I unlocked the door to my house only to leave the keys in the door knob. Luckily my other brother-in-law came over for dinner that night to find them before someone else. 

Pregnancy has made me much more conscious of my diet and routines. From the moment I found out I set out to eat much healthier I am continually trying to make sure I have a well balanced diet, and am receiving all the nutrients my baby needs.   And limiting the items my doesn't need.  Well so far this has paid off for me. I have actually lost a few pounds.   My doctor has informed me that this is sometime the case in the first trimester, usually because of morning sickness.  However, I'm still beginning to wonder if I need to be putting more effort into gaining weight although I do not want to go overboard.  Most of what I've read discusses how I only need to slightly increase my calorie intake and how a mild workout each day is beneficial to me and the baby. I hope I am doing everything I need to make sure this baby will be happy and healthy. 

In nine months will you come greet us?

So today I'm a day past when my fertility tracking app thought I would get my period, but based on what my cycle has been in the past, I don't expect it for another two or three days (the tracker thinks I should get it on day 26 as I did last month, but in previous months before I started using this tracker I was getting it on day 28 or 29). Since my last post, the tracker did update and say that it can't pinpoint the day I ovulated, but at least it does seem to think I did ovulate. I'm feeling like this might actually be the month. My breasts have been really tender the last few days which I do sometimes get around my period, but I am not feeling like my period is about to start. Of course that could be attributable to the progesterone cream I've been using, too, but I'm just feeling really hopeful right now. At least for the next few days. I'll probably wait until next week to take a test, but maybe on Thanksgiving day I'll be welcoming a new little one (that's the day the tracker tells me would be my due date if I conceive this cycle). Guess there will be another post from me in a few days...

UPDATE on 3/15: Guess I won't be buying any Adidas this month.

Are you in there little Fetus?

As they say in the song, waiting is the hardest part. I'm once again in the time between when I should have ovulated (more on that later) and when I'll get my period. Each month I try to balance the emotions of hoping that this will be the time I'll finally be pregnant and not getting over excited because if I'm not pregnant I'll feel sad and disappointed again. It's a hard balance since my husband tells me not to be negative, but if I am too positive during this time period, I feel crushed all over again when I get my period.


On top of the balancing act, there's my temperature chart, which is behaving weirdly. I use an app to track my temperatures each day. I find it a lot easier than charting on paper because the app tells me when it thinks I ovulated based on the information I feed it. This month my ovulation date has changed twice and then today when I entered my temperature I got a message telling me that there's not enough data to say I've ovulated at all - ie. my temperatures are too low. This is the problem I was having before I started seeing my doctor (I believe I mentioned in my previous post that I am seeing an actupuncturist for a more eastern approach to resolving my inability to get pregnant). My testosterone level was too high (which apparently means no ovulating), which is related to insulin resistance, so I went on a low carb diet that brought me down an additional 20 pounds, on top of 20 pounds I had already lost last year. This did the trick and when my testosterone level was checked again, it had dropped in half. Over the last few days, however, I've been noticing that my average weight has gone up slightly. Only about 3 pounds or so, hardly anything to be concerned about, but since I'm trying to monitor it very closely I thought it warranted my attention so that it doesn't become a problem. I know that I've become more lax about my eating habits since I am at a lower weight and have gotten my workout schedules screwed up the last few weeks with other things going on in my life. Today, seeing the charting issue after already thinking about my weight this morning has me freaking out that my testosterone has gone up again or something. It probably hasn't and I shouldn't freak out, but that's my initial response. And then feeling upset about it just makes me want to eat poorly and/or eat some meat (my husband and I are trying to do meatless March). Those things kind of go together since any meat I get right now would be fast food, but part of me is saying that the meat would be good because it's low carb (I've been ordering the low carb six dollar burger from Carl's) and the leftovers I brought from home are pasta. Eating meatless seems to lead me to eat more carbs (with some obvious reasons since vegetables, beans, etc. have carbs in them that meat doesn't have), but I also eat more bread and pasta products and the like when trying to eat meatless, which I apparently can't do. It's all kind of a viscious cycle in my head. This is certainly why they say it's easier to get pregnant when you're not trying because the stress contributes to the difficulty.


I guess the ways to end this on a more positive note, because I hate being a downer, are to note that I recognize I need to do something with my weight/ diet to keep from falling into old traps and letting my testosterone rise again, and to share that I will have my first acupuncture session on Friday. I've heard that the needles don't hurt and you feel really great afterwards. Since I have two tattoos, I'm not worried about any potential pain and I'm looking forward to the great feeling. Not totally sure if I'm looking forward to turning 35 the next day, but it happens to all of us.